![Past, Present & Future [w/ Bonus DVD]](http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B0000AVBDS.01.THUMBZZZ.jpg)
![The Downward Spiral [Deluxe Edition]](http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00066N8JS.01.THUMBZZZ.jpg)
11/07/2007
The Final Revolution
As words pour forth from vivid imaginings I experience what can only be described as perfect joy. As my soul finds the sweet release of things contained so long within I glory in the exquisite ecstasy flowing through my veins. It seems these feelings of anger, hatred, rage, and the burning desire to be heard have been locked within me for centuries while I suppressed them out of fear. Not fear of feeling them but fear of expressing them, fear of being judged “unfeminine” and “bitchy”. Now I proclaim these things freely, proudly, not caring what ignorant negative conclusions others may arrive at. I will no longer censor myself in a vain attempt to please this society that cares nothing for my suffering, my needs, my dreams and my desires. I now live to please myself and the select few that have earned my respect and admiration. I will bestow what I want, when I want, to whom I want. I am no longer a cowering child fearful of arousing anger in those possessing the world around me. I step out boldly, without apology, for I have apologized for my existence long enough. Now I let the words tumble forth from my fevered mind without fear of remonstration. Speaking my mind with vicious honesty, I scorn anyone who attempts to suppress my voice. Loud, strong, and clear I will proclaim my opinions, allowing no one to stop me or shame me.
As women we all need to join hands, proud, strong, unashamed, and force the world to heed us, letting nothing and no one hinder us. We must shout, we must be heard; others need to know of our experiences or all will come to ruin. We are vibrant, beautiful, glorious, and liberated. Despite that which they lead us to believe we can affect lives, circumstances, and effect change, bringing about what should have been accomplished long ago but for the eons of panicked subjugation inflicted upon us. They have always known of our power and now we must claim it. No longer will we be silenced, held back, and suppressed. The world will ignore us no longer; we will not allow them to turn away, plug their ears, and close their eyes to our knowledge, our pain, and our rage. Our words will echo across the earth bringing light to our sisters who are shrouded in seemingly perpetual darkness. We will free the captives, break the bonds of the slaves, open the eyes of the blind, and bring awareness to the ignorant. Our strength and power will reverberate throughout the universe as those who have wronged us fall to their knees pleading for mercy and compassion. We will have mercy upon whom we will and show compassion to those we so desire. In the end, together, we will right all wrongs. That is our destiny.
23:37 Posted in My Writing | Permalink | Comments (1) | Email this
05/05/2007
Diary of a Vampire
Thanks to a comment by a reader who was trying to find the beginning of Diary of a Vampire, I decided to give that story its own category. So, if you click on Diary of a Vampire under my categories and scroll down to the bottom of the page, that is where the story starts.
And, for those of you who would like to read my book from the beginning you can go here. If you go to my archives and start in April, once again scrolling down to the bottom you can find the beginning of my book there for those of you who are interested.
Laters!
12:44 Posted in My Writing | Permalink | Comments (3) | Email this
03/05/2007
Irina Goes to Alethania
Here is a little bit more of my book, for those who care.
“How was your mother?” Alethania asked as Irina set her things on the table in the front hallway of Alethania’s small apartment in the retirement community. No matter that she had known Alethania, and her extraordinary powers, for many years now, it still unsettled her when she asked about things Irina had not yet shared.“Still dead.” She snapped, instantly regretting her words. “I’m sorry Ally, its been a long day.”
She smiled and patted Irina on the arm, the touch from her small hand so light Irina barely felt it. "And your father?” Another detail Irina had not yet mentioned.
“What are the Ranee?” She blurted in an effective attempt to change the subject. Alethania stared silently at Irina as if trying to judge how much she knew.
“They are three women, gifted with extraordinary powers.” She stated simply.
“And I’m one of them?”
“Yes. Where did you hear of this?”
“I fell asleep on mother’s grave and had a dream.” Alethania sighed with understanding. She knew that sometimes a dream was not just a dream. Sometimes it was a vision.
“What did you see?”
“A black wolf. She gave me this necklace and told me I needed to prepare for evil.”
“What else did she tell you?”
“Nothing, she told me to come to you. Told me that you have the answers I seek.”
A bemused expression crept over Alethania’s wrinkled face. Just like the Lathainia to give cryptic a hint and leave the rest to an old woman.
“Sit down, dear child, I have a story to tell you.”
Irina did as she was told, curious what her surrogate mother had to say.
“In the Beginning, when the Goddesses and Gods made the world they knew that it was imperative that the Balance In All Things be maintained. To this end they created the Circle of Five, Five immortal beings whose sole purpose was to keep the Balance in place. For thousands upon thousands of years they have presided over the Universe, protecting the Balance that is so crucial to our existence.”
“But Ally, I’ve heard this all before.” Irina interrupted impatiently.
“Yes, dear child, but there is more, be patient.
Irina sighed and fell silent, allowing Alethania to continue her tale.
“There was once a demon named Balil who was determined to tip the scales of the Balance to the side of evil.”
“But to do that would release Tiamat into the world and all would come to ruin, even evil. To do so, Balil would just be destroying himself along with the rest of the Universe.”
“Yes child, so the Circle tried to tell him, but he chose not to believe their words. They knew if they allowed him to continue with his plans, he could bring about the very thing he desired, to the detriment of all.”
“He had that much power?” Irina asked incredulously, she had never imagined anyone, not even a demon, had the power to overthrow the Balance.
“Not at the time, but it was growing and the Circle knew they had to do something to stop him, so they banished him.”
“Why didn’t they just vanquish him?”
“The demon was too strong to be vanquished so they gathered their power together and sent him to the Void.”
“The Void?”
Alethania paused a moment, trying to find the words to describe the Void. “It’s a hell dimension. A vacuous pit of nothing and everything, a dimension of great evil and torment. And there Balil, now The Voice, bides his time as his power grows, until such a time as he can escape.”
“And if he escapes?”
“We fear that if he escapes he will finally have the power to fulfill his greatest desire.”
“And destroy the Balance.”
“Yes.”
“And the Universe along with it.”
“Yes.”
Both women were silent as Irina considered Alethania’s words and Alethania waited for the question she knew was coming.
“But Ally, what does all of this have to do with me?”
“As I said, you are one of the Ranee, three women gifted with extraordinary powers, that when joined together, can vanquish The Voice.”
Irina stared at Alethania for a moment before bursting into laughter. “You’re kidding right? I have the power to deal with a demon even the Circle couldn’t vanquish?”
“My dear, you are the last in a very long line of powerful Witches. You have abilities and powers you’ve never tapped into. You’ve never needed to before. But the Power of our Craft flows through your veins. In truth, your power is much greater than mine, you just don’t believe it yet.”
“No, I don’t believe it, I don’t believe any of this.”
“But you must believe it, child, evil is coming for you and you must be prepared to fulfill what you are destined to do.”
Irina shook her head violently, this was all too much. She’d grown up with the Craft, the magick, even demons, but she couldn’t believe that she had all this power, that she was destined to destroy a demon even the Circle couldn’t vanquish.
“Irina, my love, I know that you are confused, but you must listen to me, we don’t have much time, the Voice is searching for you even as we speak, and I can only keep you cloaked from him for so long. You must prepare, we must seek out the other Ranee, they know nothing of this, of magick, of demons. We must help them come into their powers so that you can fight the Voice. You have no choice, child, I’m sorry to say, but it is fate.”
“Fate? The same fate that took my mother from me? The same fate that determined I must watch my mother die at the hands of my father? I have no use for fate.”
Irina jumped to her feet and ran for the door before Alethania could stop her. “Irina, please, you must listen. The fate of everything rests on you finding the Ranee and coming into your powers together.”
But it was too late, Irina was out the door with a loud slam before Alethania could stop her.
Do not worry. She will come to terms with it quickly enough. She is strong.
Alethania turned to face the Lathainia, still in her guise as the black wolf.
“We don’t have time for this.” She snapped at the creature.
No, we do not, but we have more pressing matters at the moment. One of the Ranee has been turned into a vampire.
Alethania gasped, such a thing could not be true! “Which one?”
Katrine.
“When?”
Several days ago.
“How could this happen? Why did the Circle not stop it?”
They have lost the Sight on the Ranee and the vampire who turned her as well as another vampire, Lillian. By the time I found her it was too late, he was already burying her.
“Lillian? Why has she turned up again after all these years?”
We do not know, nor do we know what her involvement is at this point in time. We are working on it.
“But what can we do now that Katrine is a vampire? We have lost her.”
All is not lost yet, remember who her mother is. Her soul is not lost to her, there is still hope.
Irina sighed heavily. She was getting way too old for this. “What can I do?” Nothing for now. Just wait for Irina, she will be back and you must be ready to help her when she returns.
As the Wolf disappeared Alethania turned to her Book of Shadows for something, anything that could help this horrible turn of events. She couldn’t sit and do nothing, she had to do something, futile though it may be.
15:41 Posted in My Writing | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
17/04/2007
The Devil's Bride: Part Two
She entered the bar that night feeling fresh and empowered, having feasted heartily on her victim the night before. As she devoured him she had imagined the face of the bartender she suddenly coveted so and the mere thought of him sent her into heights of ecstasy she had never before reached. Yet the demons inside, though momentarily satiated, still were not satisfied and wouldn’t be until she caught her chosen prey within her web of seduction and destruction. She would have to tread carefully, she knew, but she also knew that he would be hers, body and soul, regardless of how much he fought her advances.
He felt her enter the bar before he saw her and knew she was headed for her booth. He fought the urge to go to her and present himself before her for the taking. What sort of woman was this who could weave such a spell over him that he was ready to defy his will and beg her to take him right there in the booth in the corner of his bar?
His hands were shaking and his less sensible half was fighting with all logic and reason, desperately wanting to feel the exquisite pain he knew she could inflict upon him. He took a deep breath and willed himself to ignore his raging libido as he mixed drinks and chatted with the customers crowded around the bar this Saturday night.
Though she talked and flirted with the many men surrounding her, she was acutely aware of Sam’s every thought and action. She felt his internal struggle as though it waged within her, and she was pleased beyond measure. He was fighting his urge with all of his might, that was for sure, and she relished the idea of breaking him and making him eternally hers. She might even let him suffer longer than necessary she was enjoying his discomfort so much.
She excused herself from her crowd of admirers and sidled up to the bar. She lit a cigarette and casually glanced around as though she was studying the other customers but all of her attention was focused on Sam. He didn’t notice her at first and when he turned to find her sitting there he dropped the beer mug he was wiping. It fell to the floor with a large shatter and he blushed, bending down to pick up the pieces.
She smiled inwardly then; she had him off balance, which was right where she wanted him.
As he cleaned up the mess Sam prayed with all his heart to any god that may be listening that she would be back in her booth when he stood up. Slowly he rose to his feet to find her watching him with those deep brown eyes that made him feel like he was going to melt into a large puddle right there at her feet.
She smiled a crooked smile at him and ordered a Cosmo. He focused all of his intent on making the drink, trying desperately to not drop anything else. She was dangling her hook before him, teasing him with the bait that would lead to his doom. He wanted nothing to do with the coming apocalypse and fought with himself internally as he felt her watching him, the waves of her desire washing over him, threatening to drown him in their fury.
He wanted her more than he’d ever wanted any other woman but he refused to let himself fall prey to her trap. Nothing good would come from sharing her bed and he would not give into his mad desire for her.
He breathed an audible sigh of relief when she simply took her drink and walked back to her admirers, he had been afraid she would try to talk to him and he didn’t know how long he could fight his lust with her so near to him. He could still smell her perfume hanging in the air, a seductive, musky scent that made his heart race, and the smell alone made him want to chase after her and beg her to take him home that night.
She sauntered back to her booth, knowing she had him in her thrall and that it would only be a matter of time before she had him. She could have talked to him, maybe even brought him home that night, but she wanted to toy with him a bit, bring him to the edge of insanity before she devoured him.
She had already chosen the man she would devour that night. A family man who had never once considered cheating on his wife, but he was not match for her and he eagerly allowed her to lead him from the bar out into the alley.
She pushed him up against the wall, kissing and biting him.
“Tell me how much you want me.” She whispered huskily.
“Oh god, forgive me, I shouldn’t, but I want you. I need you.”
“Good boy.” She purred, “That’s my good boy.”
She unzipped his jeans and he hiked up her dress, picking her up and sliding into her warm wetness. He had never desired a woman as he did this exquisite creature and with his first thrust he thought he was going to pass out from the pleasure of finally being inside of her.
She arched her back and let loose a low, blood curdling moan as he thrust into her. She shouldn’t do this here in this alley, so close to possible witnesses but she was voracious, felt as though she hadn’t fed in centuries. His eyes were closed so he didn’t see her as she transformed into the demon that she was, didn’t see her horrible visage or her fangs as they sliced into his flesh, only felt the searing pain for a few seconds before the poison overtook him and he fell to the ground, paralyzed, unable even to scream as she ate him alive.
16:27 Posted in My Writing | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
16/04/2007
The Devil's Bride: Part One
She sat in a booth in the corner of a dimly lit bar. The smoke curled around and through the black hair that shined with the brightness of the night sky illuminated by a waning sliver of moonlight. Her skin was the color of pale ivory and her velvet brown eyes casually darted here and there, dissecting the innermost secrets and fears of those scattered throughout the bar drinking away the reality that haunted them. She crossed her long shapely legs and turned her foot, clad in three inch black spike heels, slowly in lazy circles. She was in no hurry. The booth she occupied is empty but for her, though that does not bother her for she knows it will not be that way for long.
As her gaze flickered across each man crowded around the bar she filed them away neatly in her calculating mind according to their weaknesses. She sensed that all eyes are upon her at one time or another and she fed upon the lust she provokes in them like a vampire bat hungry for the taste of warm, sticky blood; she exulted in the power they are willing to confer to her for so little in exchange. Her delicate beauty, her exotic sensuality has never failed her, never ceased to supply her with a buffet of men to feast upon. No matter that most of them fought their lust, their need. Even the blissfully betrothed invariably surrendered to their weakness, unable to fight the desire that overpowered all else, even morality.
One by one they paraded themselves before her bearing their assets like so many red-assed baboons. Outwardly she smiled coyly, tilted her head, and caressed her lower lip with a finger tipped with a long blood red nail. Inwardly she felt the black madness swelling within her once again and she new she must act soon, she could only restrain the demons for so long. Affecting shyness she occasionally looked down, blushing prettily, pretending to be flustered by the attention. Each man that passed purposely by her booth desired her, his pants bulging with masculinity; each one would do anything she requested or demanded if only to grace her midnight blue silk sheets this night.
From behind the bar the bartender, a gorgeous specimen in his own right, watched her with a bemused expression as he mixed drinks. She was a regular in his bar, each weekend night inhabiting that same booth enticing each unsuspecting man into her grasp. To say that he was not attracted to her would be a monumental lie, but he had been with too many women like her to plunge into that vortex of agony yet again. Her heart was cold and black, no mistaking that, and he was no longer one to knowingly invite suffering into his life or his bed. A fool was one who refused to learn from his mistakes and he was no fool. Hearing a customer call for a drink he turned his back to her, promptly dropping her from his mind.
She watched the parade of men pass by, occasionally reaching out to pull a new one into the group of admirers that now flocked around her table. Succulent, luscious specimens so eager for the picking, yet she found herself hopelessly bored. They bought her round after round of drinks, most of them hoping to get her drunk enough to convince her to come home with him, but no matter how much she drank she remained clear and sharp, only feigning inebriation to allow them to think that she was vulnerable to attack.
In truth the alcohol had little affect on her, something she played to her advantage. The predator would become prey soon enough, so quickly he wouldn’t know he was being devoured until he was near to his last breath. Easy prey, every one, and inwardly she fumed at the futility of a chase that was over before the flag dropped.
She sat in the corner of the booth, men crowded in on either side and hanging over the back of the booth, touching her, caressing her, propositioning her and she began to feel claustrophobic. Normally the attention pleased her to no end, but tonight it disgusted her. These men, just throwing themselves at her, no shame, no pride, no thought to anything other than the gratification of their selfish desires. It made her want to vomit yet she was not foolish enough to blatantly cast them aside for she may require their services later.
Blushing prettily she excused herself and fled to the bathroom. Every man in the bar watched her escape towards the back of the bar until she was out of site. When their short attention spans were momentarily enthralled by the game on the giant screens she slithered her way through the crowd and up to the bar. She had to escape her admirers at least for a few moments. It wouldn’t be long before their small minds were introduced to a commercial and they would be scanning the bar for her once again.
Sighing deeply she ran her fingers through her hair and turned to stare mindlessly at the TV screen. She was woefully unimpressed with easy conquests that did not reflect upon her skill in any way; she desired is a challenge, someone impenetrable, someone locked up tighter than Fort Knox . What she wished for more than anything was a chase, the opportunity to display her skills for all to see, also offering the chance to hone them to a sharper point.
Her doe like eyes darted throughout the room as her mind quickly recalled the information she stored in the back of her mind. About to conclude that this particular bar was inadequate for her needs, her eyes fell upon the bartender. Her brow furrowed as she realized she held no information on him. She remembered noticing him briefly when she arrived at dusk but for some reason had not filed him away with the others. How odd. Resting her chin on her hand she absentmindedly drew circles in the liquid on the table that was dripping from the beer someone had thoughtlessly abandoned. Something about this man seemed unusual and she worried it about in her mind as a dog with a bone. Gradually it began to dawn on her and she was shocked by what her instincts were whispering to her. Could it be possible that this man, this trifle, does not desire her? She had hoped to find a challenge, but this is too much. This is an affront to her magnificence. She could not allow this man to insult her so horribly.
Her breath came in shallow rasps and her heart thundered, not with lust but with the same mad rage that propelled her to the bars each night. Her initial shock began to wane and she felt delicious excitement realizing that this was exactly the challenge she needed. Sensuality rolled in waves around her body as heat on pavement from the licentious anticipation raging within her. With great effort she slowed her breathing and tamed the demons struggling to escape.
Everything in its time darlings, everything in its time. She thought, lovingly offering them silent comfort. She realized that she could not rely on the tactics she had been using with these other men; this one was hardened iron, felt he had no weaknesses. Admittedly he possessed none that she could initially discern; nonetheless, they had to be there. Only the gods are impenetrable. She easily surmised the reason he ignored her, a reason which could cause him to be instantly suspicious of any overt advances on her part. She must lay the trap slowly and carefully or his senses would pick up the scent of impending danger.
Temporarily relieved of customers he stood at the end of the bar wiping beer glasses dry. Pretending to watch television she studied him from the corner of her eye in an attempt to determine the best course of action. The chances that he will leave with her this evening are nearly nonexistent, but she does not worry, if not tonight then tomorrow night, or the next. Time was not an issue for her.
He felt her presence at his bar and did not welcome it in any sense of the word. He could almost feel his skin crawl; usually content to allow the servers to bring her drinks, why was she now sitting at his bar feigning interest in the Packers/Vikings game? He decided that it was the perfect time to take his smoke break and signaled one of the servers to take his place.
Nearly running he finally made it to the back door as though she were hot on his heels. He turned to look behind him, but no one is in pursuit. He sighed deeply, frustrated with his reaction. Why was he letting this woman get to him? She posed no threat to him, he was too wise in the ways of the world to fall into her slick fingers and even so, wasn’t as though she was literally chasing him down.
He lit a cigarette and inhaled deeply, trying to calm his frayed nerves. He was being ridiculous, acting like he was being chased by the boogey man and he scolded himself inwardly.
“What’s up man?” Asked Duke, the bouncer, as he walked in from the back parking lot for his shift.
“Nothing much man.”
“Is she here?” He asked, and the bartender knew exactly to whom he referred . Every man that worked at Uncle Ed's Bar and Grille, with the notable exception of one bartender named Sam Hill, hoped that woman would someday invite him into her bed.
"Yes." Sam replied with an exceptional lack of enthusiasm.
"Dude, I don't get you. You are like, the only guy in this bar who doesn't want to shag that bitch. She's so unbelievably fine. What, did you switch sides or something?"
“Not hardly, I’m just no fan of pain, and believe me, pain follows that woman wherever she goes.”
“A little pain never hurt anyone, I always say.” Duke remarked, lighting up a cigarette.
“Whatever floats your boat, man.” Sam remarked, dropping his cigarette and crushing it beneath his boot before walking back into the bar.
When he returned to his post she was gone and he found himself to be slightly disappointed by that fact, a feeling he quickly crushed, much like he had his cigarette outside.
17:57 Posted in My Writing | Permalink | Comments (1) |